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:icondisrhythmic: More from disrhythmic


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ENGLISH LANGUAGE by lombregrise

All The Poets Come To Life by flummo


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Submitted on
December 6, 2012
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Listen to the audio version for the full effect, pretty please.

cloudshot sky like an oil painting and i am watching the
seagulls. i--
darling, i will swim for you
and swallow every whitecap.
i will pluck myself a coat of pelican wings,
sew them up with salt and spray--
become icarus for you.

you are calling me across the waves, love--
but you pull against the ache
in my bones, the hollow--
the clawing out for unseen sunsets and unturned tides.

i hear you, love
give me time.

i will always listen.
The minimalist redux of Syracuse. I think I like this one better.

Opinions would be lovely. :heart:
Add a Comment:
 
:iconlombregrise:
lombregrise Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2013  Professional Writer
nice reading once again :rose:
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:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2013
Thank you! :heart:
Reply
:icontisserande-d-encre:
tisserande-d-encre Featured By Owner Jan 8, 2013  Student Writer
Who needs drugs and cannabis when you can fly just by listening and/or reading to this??
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2013
Hahaha, this is your brain--this is your brain on Dizzy. <3
Reply
:iconblacksand459:
Blacksand459 Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
"cloudshot sky like an oil painting and i am watching the
seagulls."


Lovely. Haunting. B-)
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013
Thanks so much! :heart:
Reply
:iconblacksand459:
Blacksand459 Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
You're welcome! :)
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
just stalking your comments on the Literature Experiment a wee bit

"become icarus for you." beautiful as ever :heart:
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:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Dec 23, 2012
Thank you, sweetheart. :huggle:
Reply
:iconarchelyxs:
archelyxs Featured By Owner Dec 21, 2012
Terrific work, both the audio and the visual. :heart:
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012
Thanks so much! :huggle:
Reply
:iconlaitma:
Laitma Featured By Owner Dec 14, 2012  Student General Artist
"I'll be Icarus for you, love"

Oooooooooh, a shiver ran down my spine. <3
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Dec 14, 2012
:la: Oh gosh, yay. :D
Reply
:iconthypoetsorcerer:
ThyPoetSorcerer Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I keep coming back to read(listen) to this piece night after night. The way you portray romance as something supernal is so beautifully done, it takes my breath away every time.
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2012
:blush:

Thank you so much, love. :heart: That means a lot to me. :huggle:
Reply
:iconfuzzyhoser:
FuzzyHoser Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
This is gorgeous, dear, as is the reading.
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012
Thanks so much. :heart:
Reply
:iconfuzzyhoser:
FuzzyHoser Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
You're very welcome. (:
Reply
:iconprideofpanem:
PrideofPanem Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2012  Student General Artist
Your voice reading this gave me chills. That seems like an awesome idea to get your poetry across. I might try that someday.
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2012
Thank you. :heart:

You should! :D
Reply
:iconpursuingthecerberus:
PursuingTheCerberus Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Professional Writer
"i will pluck myself a coat of pelican wings,
sew them up with salt and spray--
become icarus for you."

love it!
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012
Thank you, dear. :heart:
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
the clawing out for unseen sunsets and unturned tides.
--I like the 'clawing out for'. an interesting mix of calling and cawing like a fusion of human and seagull all mixed with the act of moving through something to get to something else.

same sentiments as the first but very different. Maybe it's just the change in presentation.
I like this one better as well. It feels more seasoned.
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012
Oh wow. Jesus, I wish I'd done all that on purpose... ^^;

Thanks so much. <3
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
hehe, subconsciously maybe?

welcome :)
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012
Yep, let's go with that. :XD:

:heart:
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
agreed :thumbsup:

are you going to do a reading? haha sorry, I feel like I ask this every time.
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012
Already did. ^^ -pokes link at the top-
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:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:facepalm: I must be blind.
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:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012
-pats- Is kay. <3
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(1 Reply)
:iconnawkaman:
nawkaman Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012
"i will pluck myself a coat of pelican wings,
sew them up with salt and spray--
become icarus for you."

Loved those three lines. The poem as a whole is very good. I like the way you purposefully interrupted the flow of the poem. It gave it more of a human voice, in my opinion.
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012
Thank you so much. <3 Honestly, 'coat of pelican wings' is one of those images I desperately wish I could draw. Glad you liked it too. :huggle:
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