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and what immortal hand or eye could frame
the cities drowned in sharp, unspoken fears,
and sound the silent depths and dream to tame
their deepest of abyssal teeth. and years
     will pass and years will follow down below.
     and roaming jaws will take their prey and grin
     and fear no cosmic consequence. they know
     that blackened waves will hide the darkest sin.
          no faith survives these godforsaken seas,
          no faith can match the weight of death and space--
          the snow of snuffed-out souls feeds this disease:
          leaves leper scars on corpses doomed to waste,
               and soft, with gentle hands it leads them down
               and hushes restless lungs, and lets them drown.
I was struck with the ridiculous idea of writing a sonnet. I'm a bit iffy on that last quatrain... the whole space/waste bit just bothers me.

(Ocean planets--the thought of an entire world being completely covered in water. Scares the crap out of me.)

This is part of a larger project of mine I'll hopefully be unveiling soon. :heart:
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:iconthypoetsorcerer:
ThyPoetSorcerer Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
How could I go on so far without reading this?? The audio version is even sweeter. I love so much being alive right now.
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:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2013
:heart: Thank you so much, darling!
Reply
:iconriseandbe:
RiseandBe Featured By Owner Aug 11, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Hi! Just wanted to let you know, this has been included in my "More Love For Favorites" feature series here: fav.me/d6hnd6h
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:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Aug 12, 2013
Thank you so much! :heart:
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:iconriseandbe:
RiseandBe Featured By Owner Aug 13, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Always my pleasure, dear! :heart:
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:iconriseandbe:
RiseandBe Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:iconthisplz:

Holy crap on a log.
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:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2013
Ahhhhh thank you! :D
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:iconriseandbe:
RiseandBe Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
My pleasure, dear!
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:iconcality:
cality Featured By Owner May 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
This flows beautifully. :clap:
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:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner May 5, 2013
Thanks so much. :heart:
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:iconcality:
cality Featured By Owner May 6, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome. :aww:
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:iconthemeadiator:
TheMeadiator Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Absolutely fabulous. And I agree - as drawn as I am to water, I have a very healthy fear of drowning. It would be utterly terrifying. When I think about it, this poem evokes the same anxiety. Really amazing work, as always!
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:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2013
Drowning is about the worst death I can think of.

Except maybe being buried alive. (I have this weird mix of claustrophobia and agoraphobia--I'm a little strange.)

Anyway. ^^;

Thank you so much! :heart:
Reply
:iconthemeadiator:
TheMeadiator Featured By Owner Apr 7, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Yeah pretty much!

And that would suck too, for sure.

You're welcome!! Thanks for sharing it!
Reply
:iconspearofhope:
spearofhope Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Someone that understands Sonnets... Remarkable.

Perfectly done, utilizing it's Rhythm and growing from it rather than being constrained by it. Chilling and pensive, such a beautiful poem.

And your voice adds a whispered weight to it all.

You've written of the Ocean before with love. Too much of a good thing, eh?
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013
Thank you so much. :heart:

Not necessarily, no. It's my greatest love and my greatest fear all at once.
Reply
:iconjuniorel:
juniorel Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013   Writer
What a dark and beautiful sonnet.
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013
Thank you. :heart:
Reply
:iconanisia-gypsy:
anisia-gypsy Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Watch "Waterworld". :)
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013
Ooh, I've heard of that one... is it good? :D
Reply
:iconanisia-gypsy:
anisia-gypsy Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
It's different, but definitely worth watching once.
Reply
:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013
"Tiger, tiger, burning bright..."

I like it. And I'm jealous. I have no rhyme or rhythm in me.
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013
Thanks so much. :heart:
Reply
:iconlovedoesnotexist:
LoveDoesNotExist Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Your voice gives me shivers.
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:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013
:blush:
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:icon1nkl1ng:
1nkl1ng Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013
Wow. This is just spectacular.
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:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013
Thank you. :heart:
Reply
:iconlaitma:
Laitma Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013  Student General Artist
Daaamn, I don't usually like sonnets either (probably just because I was forced to write one for class once and it... didn't... work lmao) but jeez, beautiful yet subtle in ways I didn't know sonnets could accomplish! So nice.

...Me, meanwhile, I think I'd love the idea of a whole world covered in water... (if I could live aquatically. I get motion-sick on boats... >_>;; )
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:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013
OMG thank you so much! :heart:

(All water, no land, and endless, endless deep ocean? I dunno. Preys on my agoraphobia. :P)
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:iconlaitma:
Laitma Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013  Student General Artist
Ah, now me, I love that sense of wide vast space... xD
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:iconpauper-circumstance:
Pauper-Circumstance Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2013
Well, if you would like to live on a water planet, here you go: [link] I was reading a bit on planets and came across this. I can't say I would like to live on a world of just water, but I guess to each his (or her) own (though I'm not sure what you'd eat there.... :shrug: )
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:iconlaitma:
Laitma Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2013  Student General Artist
Ahahahaha, that planet seems to have a surface temperature of 400 F and shrouded in steam, so... @_@;;

I just think more of an endless ocean kinda setting, haha. I'd love to be a whale shark or manta ray and just filter feed... *-*
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:iconpauper-circumstance:
Pauper-Circumstance Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2013
So, you have a 24/7 jacuzzi tub! What's the big deal? And if you ever want to make a little pasta for yourself, you got the boiling water right there. ;)

Oh, well, yeah, I guess that's sort of different. I'd prefer to be a dolphin. I love dolphins. :)
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:iconpalaeorigamipete:
palaeorigamipete Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I really need to start reading your poems aloud when reading them. I tried it this time and... :jawdrop:
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:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013
:D
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:iconpalaeorigamipete:
palaeorigamipete Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
:aww:
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:iconlombregrise:
lombregrise Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013  Professional Writer
:)
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:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013
:heart:
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:iconnawkaman:
nawkaman Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013
It's pretty wicked awesome if you ask me. :love:

And I'm not usually into sonnets.
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013
Thank you! :D
Reply
:iconthatlibraryguy:
thatlibraryguy Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013
You've outdone yourself.. this is... epic. I absolutely love it. Please write more of this!
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013
Thanks so much! :D
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